'Allo 'Allo!: Series 1

Meet René, the most wanted man in occupied France. Women want his body. The Resistance want his brain. And the Nazis want his sausage. In a small café in Nouvion, France, this harassed proprietor is having a difficult war. With the German Army in residence at the bar, René is risking his neck to aid the Resistance by hiding two British airmen and a radio transmitter upstairs. As if this wasn't enough, René has also got involved in hiding a priceless painting in a garlic sausage, which even now is being sniffed out by the Gestapo. But René's real problem is his wife, Edith, and what she will do to him when she finds out about his affairs with two sexy waitresses!

The British Are Coming - The Village of Nouvion in Occupied France, 1941. Two escaping British airmen are sent by the French Resistance to hide in Rene’s Café, a small dining establishment. But nobody at Rene’s speaks any English, and no one is ready for the intrigue that follows.

The Fallen Madonna - Enter Herr Flick of the Gestapo, who begins to investigate the disappearance of a valuable painting, The Fallen Madonna. Why are Colonel von Strom and Captain Goering lending their uniforms to the British airmen?

Pigeon Post - Fearful of being caught in the German uniforms and being shot as spies, the British airmen burn those uniforms. This reduces Colonel von Strom and Captain Goering to dressing as French onion-sellers.

Saville Row to the Rescue - Still disguised as onion-sellers, the Colonel and Captain are waiting on tailors in London (under direction of the Resistance) to sew them new uniforms. But Herr Flick is looking to infiltrate the ranks of the onion sellers.

The Execution - René is on his way to blow up the railway, which Captain Goering has already destroyed accidentally. Rene is captured by General von Klinkerhoffen, who demands of Colonel von Strom that Rene be shot. Lieutenant Gruber gives the command to fire!

The Funeral - After Rene’s supposed execution, Herr Flick insists that his funeral be attended by senior officers to seek out the members of the Resistance. René has come back as his own twin brother, also named René, who now must plan for his own burial.

Red Nick’s Colonel - In retaliation for the killing of Rene, the Communists kidnap the Colonel and the Captain. Luckily, in the process of escaping the Communists with the assistance of the Gaullist Resistance, the officers manage to get back The Fallen Madonna.

The Dance of Hitler Youth - The Germans celebrate the burning of the Reichstag (by having the young girls of Nouvion dress as Hitler Youth and perform Bavarian dances). Meanwhile, René and Edith don disguises to attempt to substitute a forgery of The Fallen Madonna for the real painting.

René Artois	---	Gorden Kaye
Edith Artois	---	Carmen Silvera
Yvette Carte-Blanche	---	Vicki Michelle
Mimi Labonq	---	Sue Hodge
Madame Fanny La Fan (Edith's mother)	---	Rose Hill
Michelle (of the Resistance) Dubois	---	Kirsten Cooke
Monsieur Roger Leclerc	---	Derek Royle
Colonel von Strohm	---	Richard Marner
Lieutenant Hubert Grüber	---	Guy Siner
General Erich von Klinkerhoffen	---	Hilary Minster
Private Helga Geerhart	---	Kim Hartman
Herr Otto Flick	---	Richard Gibson
Herr Engelbert von Smallhausen	---	John Louis Mansi
Monsieur Alphonse	---	Kenneth Connor
RAF Flight Lt Fairfax	---	John D Collins
RAF Flight Lt Carstairs	---	Nicholas Frankau
Officer Crabtree	---	Arthur Bostrom
Captain Alberto Bertorelli	---	Gavin Richards
Louise	---	Carole Ashby

Produced and Directed by David Croft
Written by Jeremy Lloyd, David Croft, Paul Adam, John Chapman, Ian Davidson, Ronald Wolfe, Ronald Chesney

Officer Crabtree's spectacularly bad French was inspired by former British Prime Minister Edward Heath, who was never mistaken as a native speaker of the language.